How to Video Call Your Grandkids: FaceTime vs Zoom for Seniors

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Here in western Connecticut—from Litchfield County down through Fairfield and New Haven—we've helped hundreds of grandparents set up video calls so they can see their grandkids' faces light up on screen. Whether you live in Heritage Village in Southbury or anywhere else in our service area, this guide will walk you through your options.

FaceTime vs Zoom: Which One Should You Use?

The short answer: if everyone in your family has an iPhone or iPad, use FaceTime. It's simpler. If your family uses a mix of devices—some have iPhones, others have Android phones or regular computers—use Zoom. That's really all there is to it.

Setting Up FaceTime (For iPhone and iPad Users)

1. Make Sure FaceTime Is Turned On

   Open your Settings app (the gray icon with gears). Scroll down until you see FaceTime and tap it. At the top, there's a switch—make sure it's green. If it's gray, tap it to turn it on. You'll need to enter your Apple ID password, which is the same password you use for the App Store.

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2. Add Your Family to Contacts

   Open the Contacts app (or go to the Phone app and tap Contacts at the bottom). If your grandkids aren't already in there, tap the plus sign at the top right. Type in their name and phone number. Make sure you have the right number—it needs to be the number connected to their iPhone.

3. Make Your First Call

   Open the FaceTime app (it's a white icon with a green video camera). Tap the plus sign at the top. Start typing your grandchild's name, then tap on their name when it appears. Tap the video camera icon. That's it! The call will start ringing through.

4. During the Call

   Hold your phone upright, like you're taking a photo. You'll see yourself in a small box in the corner—that's what they're seeing. The big picture is them. If you can't hear them well, use the volume buttons on the side of your phone. To end the call, tap the red button at the bottom.

Setting Up Zoom (For Anyone With Internet)

1. Download the Zoom App

   If you're on an iPad or iPhone, open the App Store and search for "Zoom Cloud Meetings." Tap Get, then Install. On a computer, go to zoom.us and click "Download" at the bottom of the page. Don't worry about creating an account yet—you don't need one just to join calls.

2. Joining a Call Someone Else Started

   This is the easiest way to use Zoom. Your family member will send you a link (probably through a text message or email). Tap or click that link. The Zoom app will open automatically. Type in your name when it asks, then click "Join Meeting." Two important buttons will pop up: "Join with Video" and "Call using Internet Audio." Click both of them.

3. Starting Your Own Zoom Call

   Open the Zoom app. You'll need to sign up for a free account—tap "Sign Up" and use your email address. Once you're in, tap the big orange "New Meeting" button. Then tap "Invite" at the bottom and choose how to send the invitation (text message is usually easiest). Your grandkids will get a link they can click to join you.

4. Zoom Call Basics

   Bottom left corner: the microphone button. If there's a red line through it, they can't hear you—tap it to unmute. Next to that is the video camera button. Same thing—if there's a red line, they can't see you. Don't worry if you accidentally hit these buttons; just tap them again to turn things back on.

Important Things to Know

About Your Internet Connection: Whether you have Frontier, Optimum, or Xfinity internet service here in Connecticut, you need a decent connection for video calls. If the picture keeps freezing, try moving closer to your WiFi router—that white or black box with the blinking lights. If you're on your phone, you can also use your cellular data, but be aware this uses up your data plan.

WiFi Password Reminder: If you haven't connected to your home WiFi in a while, the password is usually on a sticker on the bottom or back of your router. It's a long string of letters and numbers. Write it down somewhere—you'll need it.

Testing Before the Big Call: Ask one of your kids or grandkids to do a test call with you before a big family gathering. That way you can work out any problems when there's less pressure.

Which One Should You Actually Choose?

For one-on-one calls with a single grandchild: FaceTime is easier if you both have iPhones or iPads. You don't need to download anything extra or remember passwords.

For family gatherings with lots of people: Zoom works better because everyone can join from any device. Your daughter can be on her iPhone, your son on his Android, and your other grandkids on their tablets. Zoom also lets you see more people at once on the screen.

Here's what most of our customers end up doing: they use FaceTime for quick calls with individual family members, and Zoom when the whole family wants to get together for birthdays or holidays.

Tips That Make Things Easier

• Prop your tablet or phone against something sturdy (a cookbook works great) so you don't have to hold it the whole time
• Sit with a window in front of you, not behind you—otherwise you'll look too dark on camera
• If you wear glasses and see yourself reflected in them, tilt your screen down slightly
• Have your device plugged into the charger during long calls so the battery doesn't die
• If the call sounds echoey, ask the other person to use headphones

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Do I need to pay for Zoom?
A: No, not for regular family calls. Zoom's free version lets you talk one-on-one for as long as you want. Group calls are limited to 40 minutes on the free version, but that's usually plenty for a family check-in. If you want longer group calls, it's about $15 a month.

Q: My grandkids want to use something called WhatsApp or Skype. Are those different?
A: Yes, those are other video calling apps that work basically the same way. WhatsApp is popular if your grandkids are overseas because international calls are free. Skype has been around longer and some people prefer it. The concepts are all the same—download the app, add contacts, and start a call. We can help you set up any of them.

Q: Can someone see inside my house during these calls?
A: They can only see what your camera is pointed at. If you're worried about background clutter, sit with a plain wall behind you. Both Zoom and FaceTime also have "blur background" features that make everything behind you fuzzy. In Zoom, tap the three dots, then "Virtual Background," then "Blur."

Q: What if I accidentally hang up on someone?
A: Don't worry, it happens to everyone. Just call them right back the same way you called them the first time. On FaceTime, you can see your recent calls and just tap on their name again. They'll understand—technology takes practice.